Goodbye Summer, India and welcome Fall

This summer has been a very interesting one. One that was different from the others. And as we are heading full force into Fall it feels like I am leaving something behind. Yet all that has happened within the last couple of months has been leading up to this point. The start of something new, new grace, new beginnings, new dreams – all of it and I am on the verge of something magnificent. I haven’t seen it yet, I cannot touch it yet but it is there lingering around the corner, about to become visible. In order to start the new season I have to finish one, recapitulate what had the most impact on me. Gather my thoughts and remember what it all was so I can learn and grow as a person.

I had the priviledge of leading a team of youth together with a friend to India to serve a ministry there. It wasn't my first time in India but I took so much from the culture, country and people with me like I understood all of it a little better. I took in every single moment trying to memorize all the beautiful faces I saw because truth be told Indians are beautiful people.
We were extremely blessed by the people and their hearts and culture to honor I believe I should adapt some it in my own life. To always hold other people higher than myself.

We taught some German at the school, answered their questions about our country and sang songs with them. I love these kids. I love how happy they are and how inviting into their lives they are. You don't get that here in Germany. These kids just smile at you and want to be close to you and call you sister or "aka". Their eagerness to learn amazes me. How often did I sit in school not even being remotely interested in what we were learning. Yet these kids here love school. It is one of their favorite places to be.

I am all for helping to help yourself when it comes to development aids. I think it is completely wrong to impose our western ways of doing things on other cultures. I also believe it is wrong to keep giving money and keep giving money and hence making people dependent on our money. Rather help people to earn money, help them find ways to be better off or sustain themselves. That is why I thought this ministry was doing such a great work. Their goal is to be self-sustainable and they keep finding new ways to do so.
Oh and by the way they serve about 2000 meals each day. Above you see the kitchen where they make tons of rice and curry. The smell and the heat in that kitchen were indescribable and the things cooked were delicious. On a sid note: I love indian food.

The area we were in was extremely beautiful and green because it had rained a lot before we came. The beach was so different than what we westerners are used to. We actually went into the Indian Ocean with our feet, the waves rushing in an out.

  

Yet when you do go into the villages and towns you do see an India that is hidden in the Bollywood movies. It is the real India which you get a glimpse of in the movie Slumdog Millionaire. It is the India that a lot of people might be afraid of or where the cultural shock could come from because it is nothing of what we know. But to be honest for my team and me it was just beautiful to experience. We wanted to see everything get a look at everything and really experience the real India which in fact is the people.

There are so many things and highlights I could talk about. Things I learned, things that were terrible to see, things which challenged me. I think a lot can be said through the pictures and I hope you get a glimpse of the beautiful summer I had.
Now it is starting to be Fall and like I said I am ready for change. My arms are wide open for whatever is coming my way. I know it will be fantastic because I trust in a God who gives exceedingly, abundantly and above. I can take these things learned now and transform them into something new. I can use these things and become a better person and a better leader in order to fulfill God's calling for my life because that is all I want.

So, hello Fall and all you have to offer. I welcome thee with my arms wide open.

xoxo

Ramona

Back... not yet

I'm back from an unbelievably awesome time in India. I don't feel ready yet to write about everything. So please, give me a little more time. I'll write. I promise.

xoxo

Ramona

India

I'm in India. See you in 2 weeks.

xoxo

Ramona

Ulysses

I know I have said this before but sometimes music comes to you in a time and place where it is exactly what you needed. It describes your journey and colors your life with words and sound. Like in a movie you start seeing yourself walking a certain road and that certain music accompanies your walk.
Josh Garrels' music is like that for me. It completely came at the perfect time. The words, the music, the variety of his musicality touch my soul in a very deep place. A lot of his songs bring me to tears and my heart resonates with the words sung.
I had difficulties chosing a song to post here but this one really is one of my favorites from the album Love & War and the See in between.



xoxo

Ramona

PS: You can listen to more of his songs on my Current Soundtrack

Summer Love List

I love this summer. While everybody was talking about the big heat they had we were sitting here with only 15°C wishing for summer. And now it is here and it is hot. So naturally life is slowing down a little.
I am thoroughly enjoying it and have soaked up so many moments in the last two weeks.
So here is my summer love list:
Biking in summer rain and catching rainbows
Reading this book under a tree in fields where all you hear is the wind blowing through the grass
Listening to this music in my Current Soundtrack. It takes my breath away.
Watching this movie and being inspired to look like they did in the 40s and 50s. Also... I just have a thing for superheros :-)

Only a couple more days until we leave for India! I can hardly wait and am all excited about that!

Are you enjoying your summer or are you all set and ready for the fall?

xoxo

Ramona

*picture from here

I biked through the fields outside of town, warm drops of summerrain on my skin and all I felt was complete joy.

Quiet

I have been meaning to write but didn't want to write for the sake of writing. I want to write when I feel inspired to tell a story or encourage others, raise questions or tell about adventures. This blog is not to be filled with hundreds of posts to fill it up but rather with meaningful words straight from my heart.
Last week I sort of unplugged from a couple of things and spent time with friends, did some things in the appartement and just read a book. It was a quiet yet beautiful and relaxing week and it felt good to work with my hands and find new inspiration.


Summer nights in Basel are beautiful especially when shared with friends. We didn't really do anything in particular. Just walked, talked, sat at the Rhine and enjoyed being together.


I finally did something with our wall in the living room It has been on my mind so often but I had never really found time and inspiration until last week where all of a sudden I knew what to do and went for it and did it. It's 15 silver frames with black and white photos of our friends and us. How perfect is it to share an appartment with your best friend!
Also I made my very first very own french fries takend from here to have a little solo movie night. I watched Brothers and it touched me deeply. Such a sad and dramatic movie. I don't think we can ever understand what happens in war. I remember my grandfather telling us the story of how he was imprisoned during World War 2 and he always stopped telling the story at one point and we never found out what must have happened there.



Larissa and I finally had a our long planned for Pride&Prejudice evening. It was beautiful. We wore dresses and ate salty butter on english muffins and dipped cooked broccoli and drank berry water and black tea. It was truly wonderful.

So, yes, I have just been living life and enjoying the quieteness to be fueled up again for when fall starts in a couple of weeks.
I guess I will stay unplugged a little longer before I head out to India in not more than two weeks. So until then, enjoy your times, live your dream, relax and let God show you some new things!

xoxo

Ramona

Page 28

I haven't posted any Sleeping at Last lyrics in a while but today I have to because this song from their new "August" EP is breathtaking again and just completely speaks to me as I feel like entering a new season in my life. It takes courage and trust and leaving things behind but that's a good thing.

So... Page 28

Have you read the script?
Could you picture it?
...is it worth the risk?

Everything I love
Is on the line
On these neon signs

But I need to know - when you looked away
Was it something that I said?
Was it something that I said?
Well okay, okay I need you more than I did before
Now that the concrete is nearly set

Here in the second act I'm living in repair
Strange how the heart adapts when its pieces disappear
And there on page 28 I'm so tired of drying glue
I begin my grand attempt at building something new

Though I tend to write
The epiphany more immediately
I guess I'm trusting that there's such a thing
As elegance in dissonance

God, I'm skeptical of pulling scenes
Was it something that I said?
Was it something that I said?
Please don't get me wrong - I still need your help
As history repeats itself

Here in the aftermath I'm pulling at the seams
Strange how the heart adapts in the absence of routine
And there on page 29 I find "new" and make it mine
But I can't help casting shadows on all I leave behind

Maybe I could afford to change a bit
Even let go of the reigns?
Every torn out page was worth the risk
Now that the stakes have been raised

So here in the final draft
I've given all I have
Strange how the heart expands in the absence of a plan
There's nothing left on the page, but I'm ok with that
For I found my resolution
Was designed for stronger hands

You can listen to the song here.

xoxo

Ramona

For you

I know I haven't said much about the wedding here yet and to be honest the wedding was something so precious for me it's hard to really put into words. How do you describe your younger sister's beautiful wedding where everything seemed perfect?

At the wedding we had people leave audio messages for the couple so they can listen to them. Yesterday my friend and I delivered these messages and pictures as we were over for dinner at my sister's house. As we listened to them I realized that the message I had left was merely what I wanted to say. There was just so much going on that day.
I guess what I wanted to say was that I believe that my sister and brother in law are setting an example not only for the way they lived their relationship and how the wedding was but also now in their marriage. I believe God has great plans for them together and I cannot wait to see them coming to be. I believe many people especially the youth in our church but also older people look at you and watch you and they will want what you have because Jesus is the center of your relationship, because you have a pure and holy relationship and because you are best friends.

I am overly proud of the both of you and love you so much. Looking at the both of you makes you realize how much reward lies in waiting for the right one.

xoxo

Ramona

Here.

Any words about this would be vain so I let the dancing speak for itself.



xoxo

Ramona

Friendship and Summer

Ok... people get ready as there will be a lot of posting this week. I have so much to talk about and to share... oh my... it will be great. I feel inspired.
First off I have to tell you about an amazing weekend filled with so much love and friendship it was crafted for me.
Saturday night my best friends took me out for dinner. It has sort of become a tradtion amongst us that whenever one of us has her birthday we take her out for dinner and have girl time, girl talk and I just love these times. We've all grown so close to each other and these girl times are indescribable. We are sisters and we are friends and together we can do so much. I feel humbled and honored with such amazing friends who believe in me and with who I share and do life with. I am already half in tears so I just show you a couple of pictures.




I just have gorgeous friends! Gorgeous!!!
So after we had spent time I had invited all our other best friends (meaning the boys!) to make a fire up on the castle, have smores and just enjoy the time together. It was beautiful and as we sat around the fire I was so moved and filled with gratefulness. I have a great life and the most amazing people in my life. We connect with our hearts. We are one and I am completely in awe of the friendships I have, never take any of the times we share for granted. They are heaven sent for me.
So we took pictures of firelines and created art in our eyes:




And then to top it off on Sunday night we all went to my favorite Summer Festival The Kieswerk Open Air. It is an open air movie festival which combines all things I love: Friends, Food, Art, Music and Movies. We watched this movie, watched shooting stars and celebrated friendship and summer.

xoxo

Ramona

PS: There is so much more to say but that will have to wait until tomorrow

Chasing Dreams

Picture from the summer of 2003

When I was 19 I spent my summer holidays roadtripping through California. It was the year before graduating High School and it was one of the most amazing summers. For years I had had the dream of traveling there and it was fulfilled in its own timing.
And that is how I have always been. I had a dream and went about it and it happened. But I feel something got lost along the way of graduating university, working a full time job, sort of having a routine in life. I found myself struggling to even put a dream into words. It was all very vague and not very me. I used to be the one telling everybody how important it is to dream and to chase them, trusting that God will fulfill them.
Yet my dreams over the last two years have somewhat been obsolete and unspoken of. This is not to say I didn't dream at all or I didn't accomplish anything. I do a lot of things, I live a great and amazing life but maybe I got lost a little in the hear and now forgetting to look into the future and make anything concrete.
I thought about this a lot this last weekend in London and how different it is to dream now, how much more courage it needs to step out and just go for it. It takes boldness to just take a step forward into the unknown, into doing what you actually want to be doing.
I want to be that kind of a woman. A woman who is not afraid to chase her dreams and make them reality. I believe God has a lot in store for me and by taking one step at a time and letting these dreams become reality and stepping out in faith and couarge I believe He is going to accomplish a lot through me. I want to be the visible image of an invisible Jesus here on earth! I don't want to regret anything.
So here I am, Lord! Use me, form me and let my dreams become reality.

xoxo

Ramona

Thursday Tunes

Melina is throwing me a birthday week this week and gave me the Civil Wars album as a present yesterday. I couldn't be more excited because as you know I completely fell in love with them!
So I am sharing a song they covered absolutely beautiful.



And since it is birthday week I want you to be reminded of what we did last year and how we together were able to reach out and restore a woman's face! I still feel honored and blessed by all who stepped in to make a difference.

This year I'll be celebrating my birthday in London-Town as I'm heading there for the Hillsong Europe Conference!

Until soon!

xoxo

Ramona

PS: Listen to the whole Civil Wars album in my Current Soundtrack

Stay in the Light

A couple of years ago the dance I am about to post would have deeply touched me just like Star Wars Episode 3 did (no kidding!) as I found myself in that place. In a relationship where the other person is in a dark place and you try everything to help that person come back into the light. But you fail and you are torn and shattered and become a mere shell of yourself.
But because of the love of Christ and His strength in me I was able to make a choice. The choice to walk away from that relationship in order to become myself again. I did and it took a while for me to heal, to become whole again and today I find myself stronger than before. More in the Light than ever before and I love my life!



Now when when watching this video I think of so many people who make the same mistake I did and I hope and pray that they would choose to stay in the light even if it means stepping away from something that holds them in darkness. I am not saying it is easy or not painful because it hurts cutting things away. It hurts giving up a love. Yet coming into the Light, holding on to a relationship with Jesus gives you all the provision you need. And there is healing and eventually the love you felt will die and the pain you felt will no longer be there and you will find yourself helping others who are going through what you've been through because God uses your story.

Much love. xoxo

Ramona

Therapy

The wedding was amazing and right. Pure, holy, beautiful! My sister looked stunning and it was so very special. I am sure there will be pictures coming up here at some point but I actually didn't take a single picture with my camera because I was running around the whole time, organizing, thinking, planning.
To be honest after the wedding I was so tired and didn't feel like doing anything. You don't realize it before how much energy you actually put into planning this special day for your sister. Oh but was it worth every second of it! It was so worth everything because as we were up at the castle and soaked in the atmosphere there was something special. And this special wasn't because we planned so amazingly or because everything looked amazing and people were merry. No, the special atmosphere came from my sister and Thimmo who started their life together as a married couple that day. They made a covenant that day. An eternal covenant. This is what could be felt. The holiness of that very moment. Of these two people becoming one before God. All I did in the planning process was creating a beautiful and tangible framework in which the covenant making and the intangible moments and feelings and atmosphere could happen.

But without further ado I want to share this video I found today which just watching it makes me relax. It also makes me realize who much I actually miss the ocean and the waves. There is no better therapy or way of relaxing than being at the ocean watching the waves.


PURE BRONTE from Marcus O'Brien on Vimeo.

Enjoy the rest of you week!

xoxo

Ramona

Leaving the Nest

Tomorrow my little sister is getting married. I couldn't be more excited for her! She has found the One. She's marrying her best friend.
In all the preparations and wedding planning sometimes I just didn't really have the time to realize that my little sister is really leaving the nest and starting her own little family. And then there are these moments when it just comes over me and I well up with tears. For me it also means letting go. Letting my little sister go. I know I will always be the older sister and my heart will always be to protect her, but she has Thimmo now. And I know that he will protect her and be there for her for the rest of her life.

I love you Christina! You are my sister and my best friend!

Have a wonderful weekend everybody. I will be off celebrating!

xoxo

Ramona

* My sister and me - picture taken my dad which perfectly captures our sisterhood

To whom it may concern

I officially declare this week "Love Week". My little sister is getting married on Saturday so love is naturally in the air. Celebrations are officially starting tonight with his and her bachelorette party. Just love how it brings us friends together!
This past weekend I started listening to The Civil Wars more and I fell in love with them. Their lyrics are beautiful and poetic and the sound of their music just makes you daydreaming away.

Here's a song which really touched me so I thought I'd share the lyrics with you. Also you can listen to them in my current soundtrack.

Why are you so far from me?
In my arms is where you ought to be
How long will you make me wait?
I don't know how much more I can take
I missed you
But I haven't met you
Oh but I want to
How I do
Slowly counting down the days
Till I finally know your name
Ooo the way your hand feels round my waist
The way you laugh
The way your kisses taste
I missed you
But I haven't met you
Oh but I want to
How I do, How I do
I've missed you
But I haven't met you
Oh I missed you
I haven't met you
Oh but I want to
Oh how I want to
Dear whoever you might be
I'm still waiting patiently.

Much love. xoxo

Ramona

I've got you.

This made me cry.
It spoke to my heart.



Hope you had a wonderful weekend!

Love

Ramona

Ignition

I grew up in a family full of love. Full of grace and with a passion to help people and show them the love of Christ. We have always had a home open to people and everybody who stepped in was able to feel home and welcomed. There were times when we didn't have much financially but it didn't matter because we always knew God was our provider and my parents were just super creative with how we spent our time together as a family.

Going to church was an obligation and non-negotiable in my family and I gave my life to Christ in a very early stage of my life. My parents always allowed my sister and me to be the way we are. They believed in us and trusted God that they'd raise us in a way that we learn to listen to the Holy Spirit.

Living their life the way they did and raising us the way they did they set an excellent example of following Christ, family values and marriage.

But over the years as I grew older and where I am now things become so normal. You have heard things so many time and there is a certain standard in life on how to do things. It's easy to lose a little of that passion and that first faith. But of course that is not what I want. My heart is to always grow and change and get closer to the Lord.

I do realize though that sometimes life is just sort of settling down becoming normal but I have never liked normal.

The other week I watched two movies in a row which touched me so deeply and stirred up some dreams and passions and desires. Shortly: Those things that have become normal.

I have already written a little bit about watching Slumdog Millionaire. That same week I watched Into the Wild. I had seen this movie before but it touched me again the same way. There are very rare movies where I have cried as much as this one. The same week I also read a couple of blogs and was just thinking about my life in general.

When I think about my life I don't want to be remembered for the things I owned or the positions I occupied or the carreer I have reached. I want to leave a legacy of love. I want to be remembered for the impact I had on people. That everywhere I go people will be encouraged by my actions and by my words. Life is not about positions but about relationships. First of all with Christ and then with people. I want people to associate words like Friendship, Family, Compassion, Love, Grace, Happiness with me.

I am not saying that owning things or having a nice home or car or clothes is bad. Not at all. I like to dress nicely and I love making a beautiful home but I will not allow these things to have too much priority in my life. Because life is about so much more. These things are good and needed and I definitely want to be able to reach out and be a blessing for other people also financially.

Another reason I believe Into the Wild touches me the way it does is that I don't want to be too comfortable in my life. I want to change and be refined constantly even if it hurts. Also what it does is stirr up my adventurous spirit. As a family we would not go on fancy vacations to 5 star hotels. We would go camping, driving to places or just staying at home doing day trips on our bikes or driving out to the lake.

I want to see the world, see God's beautiful creation and delight in it. I want to be captured by these moments in an adventure when you're just surrounded by beauty. I want to explore and discover and really see.

And so these things that have sort of become so normal were reignited and the passion and the fire started to burn again.

It leaves me now at this place of having to make a decision. It leaves me still dreaming about a couple of things. It gives me new direction and vision and I feel like I can see clearer, like that polaroid picture of my future has developed just a little bit more.

xoxo

Ramona

Summer Nights

I have always had a love for fire. Growing up we as a family would often hike or drive up to little fire places in the woods to make a fire and grill sausages or just enjoy it. It was our idea of picknicks especially in the spring and summer months. I would always be so fascinated by fire wanting to hold a stick in it to see the blaze in its full glory.
Today I still love fires. For me the perfect summer night means sitting around a fire with friends while the moon rises and the stars become visible. It means listening to the sound of the fire and the crickets chirping. I could sit there forever and just think, talk and be in that moment.
Yesterday Melina and I drove up to our friend's house to just hang out for a while. The few hours we spent there felt like a piece of heaven on earth. Not only did we enjoy food together and great talks but the things we did stirred up the child in me. I felt completely free and myself and happy in that very moment. We jumped into stacks of hay and sat on David's horses. We ran through the sprinklers to cool down from the hot day. Later we made a fire. We just sat there talking being right there in this moment without constraints of time. I believe it is in these moments that we grow personally and spiritually because we pause. We pause, ponder, rethink, decide, act, change.

And so as the fire was burning down I thought about the fire we carry in our hearts and how I feel so related to fire. Fire spends warmth, fire infects others. Fire is passionate. And I never want to stop being passionate about God's plans for my life and the things he puts in my heart to do. For I know that God is fighting on my side.

xoxo Ramona

* Picture from here
** my sister and I on one of our picknicks